Since I've finally finished recapping SVC, I decided to go back to watching my SVH DVDs in between book recaps. Today's episode is one that I do not remember, but the title implies that it is about poetry. I hate poetry, so this should be fun...
The episode begins with everybody going to some coffee house to hear their teacher -his name is Adam- reading some of his poetry. I guess SVH has a poetry club now, and everybody is involved. Todd isn't a fan of poetry, he thinks basketball is better (and I am inclined to agree), but Liz drags him along anyways. Jessica is in agreement with Todd as well, but Lila is suddenly very interested in the poetic arts, and she teases Jess about her complete lack of interest in anything intellectual, so Jess agrees to go along.
At the coffee house, some peop[le read their lame poetry and it's just weird. But Lila totally gets it all, even though the rest of the poetry club is just like "WTF?!?!" Adam reads his own stupid poem, and Jess does what she does best -falls in love with his ugly ass. He joins them and Jess flirts. She pretends to be super into poetry to impress Adam and it seems to work. (What is with these SV teachers? They seem to spend an awful lot of time with their students outside of normal classroom functions...CREEPER!) Jess agrees to join the stupid poetry club, hoping to impress Adam for whatever reason. Seriously, this dude is old and ugly and I wonder what she sees in him...
The next day, Jess is walking around reading some Walt Whitman poems, and everybody makes fun of her. Liz shares one of her poems with Adam, and he gives her one of his to read as well. Jess shows up for the poetry club meeting in her cheer uniform. Damn, I love when she wears that! Again, everybody makes fun of her for being an idiot. It's really sort of sad. Poor Jess! Adam reaches into his man-purse (yes, he has a man-purse!) and pulls out a poem to read. It's about him loving a girl with dark hair (and it's totally inappropriate for a school club, just sayin', keep your private life private!) and Jess automatically thinks that he wrote it about her. She says that the dark hair is only a cover, so nobody will suspect that Adam is madly in love with her. Okay then...
Jessica is inspired by Adam's poem. She writes and writes and it pisses Liz off. Liz currently has writer's block, so Jess drags her out to the Moon Beach for a break. Liz accidentally leaves her poetry journal on Jess's bed, with Adam's poem sticking out of it.
At the next poetry club meeting, Winston has decided to grow facial hair so he looks more poetic, I guess. (What is with these kids are their totaly devotion to their extracurricular activities? It's not like they'll ever mention them again after these 22 minutes...) Win even writes a poem about his new goatee. Both are extremely pathetic, and this episode really sucks! Jess reads her poem, and it's a typical Jessica piece. Of course, everybody laughs because they think she's shallow, but she gets made because she thought she was being deep. Awww, poor Jess! No wonder the girl never applies herself, everybody just laughs at her. Adam, however, does try to encourage her. He tells her that she has real potential, and she just has to keep working. he also tells her that the way people perceive her has an effect of all of this, and sometimes you have to transform yourself to create something new. (That is NOT something you should EVER tell Jessica! She takes everything SO literally, and now I can't wait to see what she comes up with for this one...) Jess is thrilled that Adam can see who she really is, and she decides to take his advice.
The next scene shows us Jessica in a bathrobe. She has a towel on her head (uh-oh!) and she is trying despearately to write a fabulous poem for the big reading on Sunday. She can't think of anything, so she opens Liz's poetry book and finds Adam's poem. Of course, she has no idea that he wrote it and she decides that Liz won't mind if she "borrows" it.
Sunday arrives, and everyone gathers for the big poetry reading. Adam's been wearing the exact same black sweater for most of this episode, and it totally reminds me of when I used to watch Passions on NBA. This girl, Whitney, wore the same outfit for like 4 months straight (one day in Passions-time, but still!) and it drove me so crazy that I had to stop watching for a couple weeks. When I got bored and decided I had waited long enough, I turned on my TV and there she was in the exact same outfit, only now she was knocked up by her brother... It was pretty twisted, and my BFF and I still joke about this, seven years later! Anyways, all the poetry reading does not culminate in anybody being impregnated by their brothers (mainly because nobody seems to have a brother...), but instead we are treated to a MONTAGE! of everybody performing. The song that plays is called "Rose Colored Glasses". It was on one of the SVH VHS tapes as a bonus music video, and I remember watching it with my then-BFF, so it has special memories for me! Love. Even better, Patti is wearing a KANGOL hat! Remember those? I do, LL Cool J looked SOOOO hott in his back in the day! Double Love.
Jess shows up late (of course!) and she's got a surprise for everybody! Her hair is now dark, and she's dressed like a hippie! OMG! I did NOT see THAT coming... She gets on stage and reads Adam's poem as her own. Of course, Liz busts her out to everybody who will listen and she demands to know why Adam isn't pissed about it.
Adam just sits back and watches her read. He says he's just happy that Jess is interested in something, and that they should all encourage her and not tell her that it was his poem. Through all of this, Todd is staring creepily at Jess. He thinks she looks hot as hell, and Liz gets super pissed about this. (Just wait a few years, Lizzie...)
At school the next day, BRUCE!!!! is walking through the halls with Manny. They're sick of all the stuck-up SVH bitches, and they wish there were some new conquests. They happen upon Jess, who is bent over in some short shorts (with a very nice shot of her ass, thanks, creeper camera guys!) and they don't recognize her, so Bruce hits on her. She turns around and Bruce is shocked, but still a little turned on.
Not everyone is so impressed. Lila says that Jess looks like "Elvira at a Pearl Jam concert" (who is Elvira?). Enid says (in a VERY annoying voice that reminds me of Willow on Buffy the Vampire Slayer) Jess looks "kind of funky". I just want to punch Enid for the way she says that. Her squeaky little voice annoys the hell out of me!!! Jess is all like "Whatever, haters!" and she says to Lila, "Adam says I look great." Lila responds with, "He HAS to say that, he's your teacher!" Ummm, NO LILA! He SHOULDN'T say that, because he's your TEACHER! Did you learn nothing from the whole Nathan thing? Either way, Enid is a dumbass and she tells Jess that she was actually reading Adam's poem, not Liz's. Jess is PISSED, especially when Lila declares that Jess knows nothing about poetry and everyone storms away all prissy-like. (#WhiteGirlProblems, seriously!!!)
Jess confronts Adam and he tells her that she is really talented and she shouldn't stop writing. She's pissed that he let her make a fool of herself, but then his girlfriend shows up and she looks EXACTLY like Jessica (please, let her turn out to be Crazy Margo!!!! PLEASE!!!! This episode SUCKS, and I'm dying here!!!). It's a Real WTF moment, and nothing is really resolved. Jessica goes home and is magically blonde again.
Later, at the Moon Beach, everyone is still discussing poetry, and Lil and Enid are fighting about some Walt Whitman (again, #WhiteGirlProblems). Jess jumps in and quotes it perfectly, and everyone realizes that she is actually pretty good at poetry. Jess doesn't feel so stupid anymore, and even Liz is impressed, so the episode ends there.
***The SarahLynn Summary***
*SVH teachers = CREEPERS!!!! Seriously, they really need to stop hanging out with their students outside of school. It just encourages unnecessary crushes and embarassment.
*Poetry is boring as hell, but montages are awesome.
*Jess has a hot ass.
*It's entirely possible to go from platinum blonde to jet black, and back to platinum blonde, in a matter of hours. With NO damage or split ends. And box color will do the job just fine, with NO fillers or toners or conditioning treatments. Yeah, I wish it worked that way! It would have saved me HOURS in Cosmetology classes.
*Jessica is afraid to apply herself, because everybody is a real dick to her when she actually does make the effort.
*Jessica is actually pretty smart sometimes.